Script tutorial

• Formatting – your script needs to look like a professional film/TV script. Go to bbc.co.uk/writersroom and click on Script Library to see professional examples.

•  Superb drama and the Polish/English element really emphasises the arthouse feel. Which word in the brief have you chosen to work with?

• The scenes are certainly achievable and I think it’s good that you’re not trying to do too much. However, is there 3 minutes of film here? I also think you need to be clear where this is in the film. Patrick naturally works as a sympathetic character the audience would like – could this not be the opening scene and the full 30-minute movie would involve him trying to escape this world? However, the gun shot might need changing. 

• Lose the swearing in the subtitles – it’s not essential and it makes it easier to enter your film in competitions/show at Media Awards if it’s taken out. You can probably keep it in Polish – it will provide enjoyment to Polish speakers who realise the subtitles are slightly edited! 

• The second part of scene 2 is the area I’d work on. You need more tension, more build-up – and ultimately the promise of a narrative if the audience kept watching.

 Next steps

Create a new blogpost called ‘Script tutorial’ and copy and paste the above feedback. Then, write a list of three ‘next steps’ for your group in terms of the video production – that could be making script/shot list changes, confirming filming dates, booking a camera with Ms Quinn or actually going out and filming the first scenes.

-Make final changes to the actual script and put it in the correct format.
-Confirm filming dates with actors in the next two upcoming weeks 
-Make some final adjustments to what shots are going to be recorded and which ones wouldnt be used at all.